Shocking, I know, I do make friends. But here’s an easy* way I’ve learned to get rid of them, if one really must.
Go snorkeling. You make new friends easy on the boat ride out, like a girl who realized her bikini top did come off when she dived from that high rock. Everyone agrees to swim together and take pictures of each other. Then you dive in and the world becomes quiet. And you can’t really turn you head too much because you’re snorkel will dip into the water and clog you breathing tube proving that you aren’t the Aquaman afterall. The water moves gently and you float absentmindly enjoying the underwater world rivaling Seaworld by a mile and a half. So as I’m swimming around it crosses my mind that I haven’t seen anyone in a while, so I pop up and I’m alone. It’s great, I don’t want to worry about where other people are and making I have enough pictures to show people, I want to enjoy the few hours I’ve got in this new underwater world.
So I lost a few human friends but I made a few smelly ones, they’re awesome.
One of my favorites. There was a plethora of these fish but their colors were amazing!
The zebra fish. I was taking a picture of their group and on my screen one was really close, I was like this is going to be a great picture! Then I realized it was in between my camera and my face!
Fish hiding in the coral. I have so many pictures, it was so difficult to just pick a few to post.
Can’t remember it’s real name so it shall be called Massive Fish. I like this picture since the guide gives an excellent size reference!
*Easy of course if you can jump on a plane, train or automobile and get snorkeling. Now isn’t that easy?
“It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt”
– Mark Twain
Oh wise words, if only I had followed them for once. I was on campus, exiting the ladies restrooms. It was one of those awkward door opening moments where someone is standing right on the other side, and the awkwardness continued as we tried to figure out who was going where. This was the first time I actually kind of looked at the person. It was a guy! Young, somewhat effeminate with short hair, baggy jeans, sweatshirt and glasses. In those brief moments I debated saying something, sometimes people just get confused and accidently go to the wrong side, but ‘No’, I think, ‘it could be a guy who identifies as a female and who am I to say anything..?’ We’re lucky, in the ladies room we have stalls so it doesn’t really matter anyways. As I pass by and hold the door for him, he takes it, I walk a step he’s just holding the door to walk in. I open my mouth and remove all doubt of my being a fool.
I say “Do you know this is the ladies bathroom?”
He says “I know. I’m… “ and gestures to their chest and then kind of mumbles something that indicates that he is in fact a she. I am mortified. She could totally read it on my face.
She says “it’s okay, it’s probably my hair and stuff”
Me – “I’m so sorry”
Her – “it’s okay”
Me – “I’m sorry” and do a little head bow, to emphasize my sorry-ness.
I walked away, so embarrassed. And as life normally does, I now see her around campus fairly regularly.